Picking wisely

Borrowed from the mental_floss website…

How to: pick your nose inconspicuously

From the increasingly ubiquitous wikiHow, tips for those who’ve got something inside (their nostril) and just can’t hide it. Admit it: we’ve all had a rock or two lodged up in there that couldn’t wait until the next strategic bathroom trip to be removed. But how to excavate without being found out?

As of today, at nearly all social levels, overt nosepicking is forbidden. Never perform a visual examination on whatever it is you have extracted from your nose! This is most amateurish and is one of the most common ways of getting caught.

The Thumb-Finger Method (super advanced)

1. Position the index finger of the opposite-side hand alongside the exterior of the obstructed channel.
2. Nonchalantly slip the thumb as deep as necessary into the nostril.
3. Using the thumbnail, delicately clamp onto the dried mucous mass.
4. Slowly withdraw the thumb and its payload from the nostril. At this step in the process be particularly vigilant for any trailing mucous which might be attached to the payload. These un-noticed “stringers” can jeopardize the entire operation.
5. Return the hand to a more natural position and discreetly execute a flicking motion with the thumb. This should launch the material sufficiently far away from you that it becomes someone else’s problem.

For more ideas, including the Advanced Hand-Guard Method and the Athletic Nose-Blow, check out the How.

blog comments powered by Disqus
  • Random Quote

    "Bravery is not a function of firepower." - JC Denton


  • Life’s Prayer

    In this battle that goes on through life, I ask for a field that is fair. With a chance that is equal to all in the strife, and the courage to do and to dare. If I should win, let it be by the code, with my faith and my honor held high. If I should lose, let me stand by the road, and cheer as the winners go by.
  • Wish List

  • Categories


  • RSS Twitter Updates

  • Past Posts

  • Songs for My Eventual Funeral


    Just Breathe (by Pearl Jam)
    Let It Be (from the soundtrack, Across the Universe)
    Long As I Can See the Light (by Crystal Bowersox)
    Time of Your Life (by Green Day)
    I Can See Clearly Now (by Jimmy Cliff)